So, I’m not nostalgic by nature. When someone says, “the good old days,” I hope they mean tomorrow. But this time of year, I find myself looking backward and forward, trying to remind myself what’s important and what behaviors I should jettison. It’s a tricky dance. 

What follows are some of the things I hope to remember this year…

I Need To Remember… 

• That sisters are forever friends and to not be mad at mine and say anything hurtful. Ever.

• That I should say “I love you” to everyone I love. Every day. In five or six different languages. And still, it won’t be enough.

• That money is just a thing, neither friend nor foe, and the more you look at it impassively, the less you fear it. 

• That I only need three kinds of shoes: Slides, Converse and pull-on ankle boots. Many pairs of each, many colors, but just those three styles. Oh, and a pair of Uggs for the snow.

• That I never really have to go out in the snow. 

• That jiggly thighs get you to the same exact fucking place as smooth ones.

• That little dogs totally, unselfishly, absolutely adore you. And it’s not weird to wish you had four. Or seven. Or ten!

• That some criticism makes you better. And some is just mean crap that jealous, less talented people lob your way. The real trick is knowing which is which. 

• That The Incredible Shrinking Man wasn’t real. And that I’ll never be trapped in a dollhouse by a cat that’s taller than the roof. 

• That grief is like an onion, and under one layer is the same thing, but packed tighter, more compact, ready to blow up like a grenade when you so much as poke it. And that it’s OK to poke it sometimes.

• That I’m an addict, and that over and over I will find something I love, and do it ’til it almost kills me.

• That I can keep my mouth shut.

• That I can speak up more.

• That acceptance is the key to all my problems—if only I knew what my problems were. 

• That I don’t know how things will “turn out.” That there really is no turning out, no ending. 

• That doing absolutely nothing is sometimes an option. 

• That love can be utterly endearing, awfully funny, achingly painful and ever so delightful.